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grace in this valley
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Sleepless Night Thoughts

amy • September 25, 2021

Faith overFear

I often have sleepless nights.  It seems my body just runs on auto-pilot mode and no amount of sleep or lack thereof changes anything. It can be very frustrating because the suffering has no end. It is around the clock with no break or reprieve - literally. An endless horrible cycle that can easily wear someone down. I decided early on when I became sick that I would not let Satan have any joy or satisfaction in my sleepless nights.  Instead I would use those nights to wage war even more through prayer over my health, my family, our finances, friends going through similar valleys and anything that God may bring to mind.


I sometimes wonder if I would just choose to be angry or upset instead, maybe I would get more sleep. I continue to keep believing that there is a greater purpose in my sleepless nights than just suffering and missing out on all the healing benefits which sleep brings. If God wants me up, then I will do it with as joyful of heart as I can muster and trust that He is moving.  Even on the hardest nights where the suffering, air hunger and pain makes it almost impossible to think.  On those nights, I just speak Jesus over everything again, and again, and again. He alone is enough and is my strength to make it through whatever those long nights may bring.


Here are the reminders currently running through my head in these wee morning hours after being up all night. Oddly these early morning hours have become a treasured gift to see the world awaken with my Jesus holding me. The reminders He gives me are always different and just run together in a fuzzy manner, but they are always the truths I need to be reminded of as I press into Him and keep fighting for another day.  These moments bring such comfort to this weary soul. I love how the Holy Spirit breathes over me exactly what I need to hear in that moment.


I sought you Lord, and you answered me and delivered me from all my fears.


I know you are working all things together for my good, Heavenly Father and that you will keep me in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because I trust in you.


Help me to be still and know that you are God.


Great is you faithfulness Jesus.


For nothing will be impossible with You. 


Your blood speaks a better word over my life and my body.


Let your steadfast love, oh Lord, be upon me, even as I hope in you.


And on and on and on the reminders go until someone in my family wakes up to start the day with me.  What reminders has God been breathing over you lately? I would love to hear them.  Please let me know if you need prayer for anything as I hope God will use my sleepless nights for His glory.


Amy<3

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